2 poems by Duncan Chambers 

Rules of the Hunt

1. The Boundaries of the Hunt shall not be limited by Time or Space

2. The Choice of the Quarry shall not be Random, but neither shall it be Rational

3. There shall be a Master of the Revels; two or three Subalterns; Goons, Jocks or

Heavies to three times the Number of Subalterns

4. There shall be Molls; Bystanders or Hangers-on; and such Supporting Players as may

be required

5. The Spoilsports may seek to regulate the Behaviour of the other Principal Parties but

may not Interfere Unduly with the Progress of the Hunt

6. A Moll may be Master of the Revels, since many Molls are Gifted with Unusual

Invention

7. The Parents of the Quarry, if there be such, shall have no Part in the Business

8. The Weapons of the Goons shall be Feet and Fists; of the Subalterns, Knives; of the

Molls, Looks and Whispers

9. The Quarry shall have Unrestricted Choice of Weapons

10. The Master of the Revels must never be seen to carry a Weapon

11. The Molls shall work in Groups, Sets or Cliques

12. The Bystanders shall have Dark Glasses, Headphones and the latest Devices

13. The Quarry may end the Hunt by a Draught; by a Leap; by a Ligature; or by Speaking

Out

14. The Subalterns may end the Hunt by a Brief Encounter; then the Parents of the Quarry

shall Come Running

15. If the Quarry shall end the Hunt, all the other Players shall become Bystanders with

Immediate Effect

16. The Master of the Revels shall have Discretion to Relocate

17. After a Year and a Day with no Records in the Annals, the Hunt shall be Suspended

18. A Suspended Hunt shall remain on the Back-up Drive for Perpetual Storage

Sixteen footnotes 12345678910111213141516

1 A term of endearment, now regarded as offensive

2 It follows the course of an ancient packhorse route

3 The Mabinogion, or possibly the Mahabarata

4 A common trope, but the changeling is usually adopted by a noblewoman

5 The author claims to have been an eye-witness

6 Magpie feathers are also thought to have this property

7 Vladimir Nabokov, Dwight D Eisenhower and Beyonce Knowles-Carter

8 There are at least 80 crossing points

9 A poultice or dressing (North Derbyshire dialect)

10 1926-2020

11 Now in the archives of the Archdiocese of Munich

12 Almost any kind of smoked fish

13 Analysis later revealed that the stains are not blood

14 The whole narrative should be treated with caution

15 A Google search turned up no results

16 The file is closed until 1 January 2100

_________________

Duncan Chambers won the Poetry Society’s Hamish Canham prize in 2018. His pamphlet Sleeping through the Moon Landing (4Word Press) was published in 2020.